19. With Mike Stefanidis, Mike Coyne, Paul Huyser, Clayton Clark III, Ron Luce - Excalibur, September 21-23, 1990

• This was not a good trip. Mike Stefanidis and I were collectively up about $800.00 the first night, but we ended up being down an obscene amount by the end of the trip. One nice moment: The very last place we played was the Golden Gate downtown. Neither of us had been there before. We ended up winning big (for a 50-cent minimum crap table), and the pitboss gave us a complimentary dinner (our first comp ever!).

18. With Gary Eastley, Mike James, Mike Stefanidis, Stan Wong, Paul Huyser, Mark Huyser, and Mike Coyne - Excalibur

• Gary paid for Mike James' and my airfare as a graduation present. He brought along his camcorder, although we didn't tape very much.

• On our last day in Vegas, Mike James, Gary and I ate breakfast at the coffee shop at the Dunes. We sat down and decided to play some keno. Gary and I both filled out a sheet with four numbers (mine, as always, being 42, 44, 46, and 56).

  Before the keno runner could get to us, I saw something interesting in the keno rules and mentioned it to Gary. "It says here that they have a special four spot that you can play for $2.50. There's no payoff for hitting two, and you only get your money back if you hit three, but if you hit all four you get substantially more money than a regular four spot."

  Gary decided to go for it. He asked Mike if he wanted to go in with him, and Mike said yes. Gary filled out the special four spot and then decided to play a special three spot as well. Their three spot consisted of three numbers that were also on their four spot.

  The keno runner came by, and finally our game started. I watched the board with disgust as none of my numbers was coming up. Then Gary said, "We've got two." Then suddenly, "Make that three!"

  I asked, "Are you serious? Is it the three that are on your three spot?"

  "No," he said, "We need number 7 on both sheets."

  We all sat there looking at the board chanting "Seven, seven, seven, seven...," and sure enough, 7 came up. They won $550.00 on the four spot and $125.00 on the three spot, so they split $675.00 which put them both up for the trip.

• My luck, up to the point where Mike and Gary had won their keno jackpot, had not been so good. I had lost about $500.00, and it just kept getting worse. Gary and I went to play craps at Caesars which put me in the hole for $800.00 total. I was sick about it when we met Mike back at the Dunes. I bought a shrimp cocktail and went around saying, "This shrimp cocktail cost eight hundred dollars. Mmm, mmm, boy is it good."

  Well, we still had a couple of hours before our plane left, so I decided to play a little more craps. I went up to a five dollar table at the Dunes and was up a little and down a little for about a half hour. There were some pretty high rollers at the table, including a couple from Poland who had asked for a $2,500.00 marker when they stepped up to the table.

  Finally, the fellow to my right got the dice and had a pretty good run. It put me up for the table, about $100.00. I thought there was no way I'd have as good a roll as he did, but of course I gave it a shot. I established a point of six and immediately rolled it back. I turned to the fellow to my right who had eventually sevened out with a point of six and jokingly said, "See, that's how you roll a six." The guy laughed. He had a lot of black chips ($100.00 each), and I thought, "All right. I made a high roller laugh."

  I proceeded to make another point and thought, "Hey, maybe I've got a hand going." On the next come out roll I rolled an eleven. The Polish gentleman to my left had had about $50.00 bet on eleven, and when I rolled it he tossed me a green chip ($25.00). Surprised, I thanked him and then thought, "Oh, man! This is what I've been waiting for my whole gambling life! A hot hand where I've got the dice and a high roller is tipping me!"

  Well, the hand just kept getting better and better. And every time I would win for the Polish man, he would give me a green chip, and eventually two green chips at a time. I threw out a bet on the eleven, $5.00 for me and $5.00 for the dealers… and I rolled it! I couldn't lose.

  Then, my point was six, and everybody was betting on the hardway. By now there were no red ($5.00) chips on the table, only green and black. I thought, "What the hell, the guy's tipping me," and threw out $25.00 on the hard six. A couple of rolls later, I hit it. The table absolutely exploded.

  When I finally sevened out, I had $1,000.00 in front of me. The Polish man thanked me, I embarrassingly thanked him back, and the pit bosses descended on the table to assess their losses. I was one of the more conservative bettors, so I estimate the table must have lost about $25,000.00 on my roll. I cashed out, and we drove to the airport to catch our flight.

  Mike James, Gary, and I all went home winners.

17. With Mike Stefanidis, Paul Huyser, Clayton Clark III, Ron Luce, and Greg Payne - The Landmark

• I was originally supposed to drive over with Stan on Friday morning, but at the last minute he said he couldn't go, so I rode with Mike, Clayton, and Ron. On the drive there, just before Barstow, we saw a crow fly by with a giant McDonald's bag in its beak. The bag appeared to be completely filled, and the crow could barely stay airborne.

• The Landmark was an absolute dive. We swore we'd never stay there again, a promise we'll definitely keep seeing as they've since blown the place up.

• On the second night, Greg and I decided to have a drinking contest. I matched him drink for drink as we sat there at the tables. Many people felt I won when, at the end of the night, I ordered a McChicken Sandwich and ate it. Others claim that I was not drinking as much as Greg, and some say that Greg had a disadvantage because he had been drinking the night before, but it's all just sour grapes.

• When we were all having lunch at the Stardust, Mike said something off-color, and it caught Clayton in mid-swallow. He was only drinking water, but as he started laughing he also started spitting up water and gasping for air. Initially we were all laughing at him, but the water just kept coming out of his mouth. It was dripping all down the side of his face and onto his clothes and onto the table, and pretty soon people started staring. I got embarrassed, said "That's it! I'm outta here," threw down the money I owed for lunch, and left. Apparently, after I left, he got worse and worse as if he were choking, and Mike was afraid he'd have to give Clayton CPR.^*

• While playing craps at the Landmark, somebody threw one of the dice off the table. Paul bent over to get it, and when he stood back up, he just sort of froze with a weird expression on his face. Behind him, a couple of girls had started laughing. I said, kind of annoyed, "Paul, give the dealer the die!" He did, and then said, "Greg, give me the keys to the car. I need to get at my suitcase. I just ripped my pants."

• During trip 15, we'd had a very good dinner buffet at the Dunes. So, I recommended it to the boys for breakfast on this trip. Well, apparently it was one of the worst buffets in history, although I thought it was fine. I went up to Paul and Greg and said, "I don't know about you boys, but I'm having good buffet." They looked at me like I was crazy.

---

^*Clayton eventually stopped spitting up and he was fine for the rest of the trip.

16. With Bernie, Boppa, and Mary Thrasher - The Las Vegas Hilton

• Mary brought her camcorder with her, which was nice. Unfortunately, not much happened. I had one good roll at Nob Hill (now Casino Royale) where, starting with $3.00 place bets on the 6 and 8, I won $300.00.

15. Junket with Dave Johnson, Mary Thrasher, Holly House, Linda Oldenburg, and Heidi Miller

• In order to call yourself a true Vegas person, you have to at least once go on an up-and-back junket on a bus. Why? So that you can tell all your friends what a living nightmare it is.

• This trip marked the first time I saw a craps player make a place bet on the point by putting his chips on the outside line of the Pass Line. By now, I thought I knew everything there was to know about craps, so I was surprised I'd never seen it before.

14. With Bernie, Boppa, Mom, and Sue - Las Vegas Hilton

• This was Sue's first trip to Las Vegas.

• When I got to Vegas, I had maybe forty dollars in all. I knew this wouldn't be enough, but I had no money in my checking account. Of all my credit cards, only my Visa had any room to get a cash advance, but I had destroyed it a while back so I wouldn't use it for the very thing I now wanted to use it for.

  Well, as it so happened, I had one of those goofy Visa credit card checks with me that I hoped I would be able to cash at one of those check-cashing places on the Strip. I dropped Bernie and Boppa off at the hotel (Mom and Sue were coming on a later flight), and went to two of these sleazy places.

  While I was waiting for them to make some calls and decide if they were going to cash my check, I felt as if I was committing a crime or something. These places are the worst, and I hope I never step foot in one again. Anyway, neither place would cash my check, so I was out of luck. I didn't know what I was going to do. Vegas doesn't offer much for the vacationer with no money.

  Later, Bernie and Boppa and I went to the airport to pick up Mom and Sue, and afterwards we headed downtown to the Horseshoe for prime rib dinner. It was about 11:30 p.m. We sat down at the table, and I decided, "Well, I might as well play keno. I probably won't be able to afford anything else this trip." (Can you see where the story is headed now?)

  Numbers were starting to be called out for a game, so I grabbed a keno sheet and marked the first four numbers called (42, 44, 46, and 56). Luckily I'm not the kind of person who thinks, "Oh, God, the chances of the same four numbers coming up again are astronomical!"

  I lost the first game I played, but on the next game all four numbers came up. $112.00 pay-off. Suddenly, I had money to play with, and it lasted me until the morning of our last day in Vegas.

• So, what did I do once I ran out of money on that last morning? I thought, "Well, I might as well play keno. I probably won't be able to afford anything else before we leave." I played one game with the same four numbers -- and they all came up again. This time, however, the payoff was $168.00 because I was playing the card for $1.50 instead of $1.00. I had more than enough money to play craps until we left.

13. With Dave Johnson, Marc "Phil" Phillips, Mary Whelan, Mary Thrasher, Mike James, Barbara Hewick, and Greg Payne - Circus Circus

• This was a particularly stressful trip for me as I had taken it upon myself to plan everything for everyone. Mary Thrasher and I got the ultimate boning, though, when everybody else on the trip volunteered to take a later flight and got free tickets to anywhere Southwest Airlines flew. Mary and I were in the gift shop when this happened.